August 06, 2020

 

Yesterday was a long day.

The length started when I woke up at about 6am and when I went back to sleep, I kept tossing and turning for another 6 hours. I woke up around noon already exhausted. 

Other than being sleepless, I was fine. My mom, grandma, and I went to go get groceries and I got everything I needed.

But when we got in the car to leave, "the big sad" hit me all of a sudden. I couldn't pinpoint a cause for the sudden sad feeling. I guess I was just really tired and hungry. 

We got home and put most of the groceries away and my mom got a call from my oldest sister. 

She said that both of her boys were crying and her husband had "had enough" and punched the tv in their living room, right in front of the kids.

The call ended very quickly and my parents and I were out the door again to go get J and bring him to our house. 

Upon arrival to my sister's house, her husband looks fine. He doesn't look angry or upset and I think I saw him smiling, too. Does he think this is funny? Is this a joke to him? 

He was threatening suicide just over a month ago and now he's doing this shit? Honestly my sister needs to leave him and my parents need to take custody of J. 

(I drifted away from talking about me to them, but I want to bring up the big sad again. It pretty much went away when I got out of the car to hug J and it was definitely gone when he started leaning over in the car to give me half hugs and kiss my arm.)

J is autistic and needs lots of love and attention that he can't get at his own home. If my sister were to leave her husband, there's no way that she could be capable of giving both children what they need on her own. 

I'm just wondering how long will it be until my brother in law decides to hit one of the kids? I bet that when/if that happens, it'll be J on the receiving end. 

I hope my parents finally make a decision to really step in before that happens. 
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