July 21, 2020

Dear Diary,

It's 5 AM and I still can't sleep though I feel sleepy since 11 PM.

I just feel so lonely since yesterday.

As an introverted, mostly quiet, not expressive and studious guy,

I too badly wanted a warm long hug from someone just to feel that I am loved and valued.

Haven't had any of this hug from my family because this act is an alien, awkward and unnatural act to the way we grew up as a family.

Haven't requested this kind of stuff from a friend and it's awkward because they're all boys but sometimes I like it when they initiated to hug me.

That why, it makes me strongly desire that act because I haven't gone through a lot of this stuff throughout my life.

That's why, I preferred to get it from a romantic partner because there is no shame but I don't have one LMAO.

I wish I'll meet the girl that I can talk with just how I can confidently interact with my friends.

I don't know how but I see most girls as very different with boys with the way they think and act. Well, I think it's because I don't have lot experience talking to a girl and I don't have any close friend that are girl.

(Hey, myself how can you get a girlfriend when you're so shy talking to a girl)