November 28, 2019

Its hard... Trying to keep the smiles and the fake mask up... It hurts... I struggle... I sit alone in my kitcheb most of the time an just listen to music an talk on the phone... Keeping up my usual return even tryin to full my roommate... Its getting harder... For myself... Because ive subconsciously managed to distract myself enough to keep me from dealing with everything ive made things worse... Im havjng a harder time ing asleep... Then ive keot my self awake so long when i do sleep the very few hours i get i sleep so hard i dnt know whats going on around me.... Im asking my roommate for sleeping oilms more and im drinking more an more...

I did manage to get my old job at steak n shake back.... My serving postion... But that brjngs back.more shitty memoriea ontop of it xause they saw me with bruises... New there was something going on... But it was worth dealing with all the questions.m. ive greatly missed working there...