Itsme's Dear Diary

You know, even though I’ve managed to find a job, I can’t seem to focus, my thoughts keep circling back to the past, to you, to everything I’m supposed to let go of… and the cruel truth is, part of me doesn’t even want to. No… I do want to. I know I

My dear… it’s unbearably hard when no one listens, when no one truly feels you or accepts you. When your emotions are laughed at, dismissed, and your words vanish into air as if they mean nothing. It’s as if I was never truly loved…  I was just a br

Why don’t I come here and write anymore? My life is going to hell. Winter is coming, and I’m just living in energy-saving mode. No wonder I’ve become unnecessary. Who needs a loser? Just a useless being with no future, no job, no will to live. Li

My dear, I locked myself inside my own head, drowning in silence, folding inward until it felt like I was collapsing into my own shadows, and now I am slowly getting used to this state.

I just want to say thank you to fate

“we’re perfect for those we don’t love and unbearable for those we do” My dear, perfection lies in lightness: we shrug off responsibility, we don’t think about the future with someone we don’t love, we don’t throw tantrums, we don’t demand anything.

My love… I don’t know what to write. There’s a hollow in the room, thick and heavy, like someone nailed the windows shut and sucked the taste from the air. You know, one person can’t fix anything, and honestly, you don’t even need that. What can I

My love… I hope you’re loved there as I never could make you feel. Be free, my beautiful tender flower, and be the brightest, shine bright in your bloom. I will always love you

My love… What I hate most about myself: - I hate that the moment stability slips away I fall apart — lose my bearings and explode with emotions I can’t control. - I hate that when life feels unstable I start sniffing for traps in everything, as i

My love — it’s okay. I’m trying. I’m alive. My head still aches unbearably, but I’m managing. Hope woke me up too early this morning. We’ll keep going with therapy. You were in my dreams today, and that pulled me awake and helped me keep writing

My love, I feel terrible. My head is being torn apart, I threw up. I feel like I have to get wasted even though I absolutely shouldn’t. I’ve already wrecked my medication routine anyway. Why is everything easier in the first days, and then it starts

My love, I don’t know how to do this… how to accept something I never wanted to exist. Every time I think of you, my chest tightens, my stomach twists, and it feels like my heart is caught between longing and despair. I want to scream at the universe

Hey, my love… It’s me. Do you even know how every fiber of me aches for you? How every heartbeat whispers your name in the silence? Do you remember the first time our eyes locked, how the world melted away, leaving only that electric, impossible conn

My dear, this morning I took my first step into therapy. So here I am, with a blank page in front of me, like a door just barely opening. I remember once showing my earlier writings to someone who mattered deeply to me, only to find they could not un