SweetNothings's Dear Diary

Index
March 13, 2023
Trigger Warning for anyone who struggles with thoughts of suicide…… I was on my way to work today after my lunch break and while I was driving I had a sudden thought, “I should kms.” I would never do that and the reason I would never do that is becau
Mar 13
March 08, 2023
Dear Diary, For some reason, I can never just feel satisfied. My job is great, I have the most awesome boss ever. My home life is going ok, I have the most supportive boyfriend ever, he’s amazing. It’s not him that I’m not satisfied with because
Mar 08
August 02, 2022
Dear Diary, Some days it just gets hard to fight off all the negativity my mind creates for itself. I’m trying really hard not to let my mind get to me. I’m filled with rage, sadness, and resentment today. Trying to keep positive is exhausting.
Aug 02
July 01, 2022
Dear Diary, Things are going decent. It’s just my thoughts. I’m stuck in a toxic think pattern right now and while I enjoy my time and the things I do, I still have this feeling of wishing I would just disappear. I’m bipolar 2 and I’m in a mixed
Jul 01
June 10, 2022
Dear Diary, I hate myself. For once I just wanna feel pretty and like I’m decent to look at without trying so fucking hard. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.
Jun 11
June 06, 2022
Dear Diary, It’s been awhile. I’ve been in therapy for BPD and Bipolar disorder. Not surprising, my mom had both. Kids went to Billings for  9 weeks. Im glad they went. It would have been a hard time for me if they stayed. My mom died and im not
Jun 07
February 07, 2022
Dear Diary, It has been a minute since writing. I feel all sorts of ways, so much has happened. I have so much anxiety. I started therapy because I genuinely want to fix my shitty inner self, but I don’t know what I want. Relationship wise, I hav
Feb 08
Into the void
I really have no idea why I have been feeling so unfulfilled with my life lately. Nothing feels like it ever makes my soul feel content. Nothing has been satisfying to me on the inside and I just feel like some part of me is missing. I wish I knew wh
Nov 22
November 19, 2021
Dear Diary, In all honesty I am in the worst mental shape of my life. I have never felt so lost or so fucked up than I have been for these past few months. I am so tired of pretending and telling people how “ok” I am. I have so much resentment in
Nov 19
October 25, 2021
Dear Diary, I have been stuck. I feel like I am never going to get over it. I feel like my bf is going to forever be stuck on his ex, but I feel stuck in the relationship because we have a house that I bought in my name because I planned for us
Oct 25