It's 9:04am. I sit alone at the boarding gate, waiting for the shuttle to come pick the passengers up to take us to the ferry. The departure time is at 11. I'm not normally very punctual but venturing solo on a ship for the first time coupled with my poor sense of direction, I couldn't risk getting lost at the terminal and missing my conveyance. This was only the 2nd time I've been here and during the last one, dependent on my company's navigational skills, with unthinking mind I only followed my younger sister who is the sharper one when it comes to spatial awareness.

Underestimating myself proved I overthink too much for finding my way around the terminal was executed excellently by yours truly. And by that, I mean if one can't find their way through the eyes, one must utilise other senses as a guide. In this case, my mouth. I passed all the boarding gates, meaning to read the travel schedules on the screens, till I reached the information desk and asked the lady which gate I ought to be waiting at whilst handing her my ticket for her to check. “Boarding Gate 1”—she said, and I felt thoroughly dumb. Literally the first one I passed, I thought to myself. Now I had to walk all the way back. I had trouble reading the boat schedules on the screens because I didn't have my spectacles on. Besides, even if I were able to spot the gate with the exact name of the ferry, exact place of its destination, at the exact time of its departure—with my own eyes, I would still need secondary confirmation from somebody else because I don't trust myself. (What if I find myself on a completely different island?)

I didn't sleep at all last night. Not because I was anxious for my trip but because I slept the entire day yesterday.

When I bade goodbye to each of our pets, I almost teared up. I'd be away for months…

I have started so many entries even back from 2021, the year of which I discovered this app, that are left unfinished so there are so many gaps in my updates. I hate it when that happens, when I just get tired midway or lose inspiration. I'll prolly not finish this too but hopefully I will.

Four months have passed since I posted my reconnection with Chace last December (2023). I endeavoured to write a follow-up entry relating to his surprising offer, but the desire to finish the narration went limp before I could make it halfway.

The shuttle bus is here now. I must resume this on the ship. It's a 6-hour voyage so I have plenty of time to write.

Ryo_A's Dear Diary