Dear Diary,

"I believe in miracles."

Hi,

I was listening to Neelesh Misra's Yaadon ka idiot Box season 7, "frankfurt ki shaamein", just finished it and you know how much I like the stories narrated by Neelesh Misra, it just take me to my fantasy world, I want to do more things in life which somehow I haven't done till now.

It just gives me more hopes and desires, someday I will live my life the way I want, fingers crossed 🤞.

03/11

We travelled back to Raipur, and it took fucking 10hrs instead of 5-6 hrs because mum and papa wants to go everywhere.

04/11

I woke up late, mum was asking where we can go , I said let me figure it out and before that let me go and collect the baggages and in that process my normal morning turned into somewhat bad morning when we were charged a challan of 3000 but I insisted him and end up paying challan of 1000 and yes because of somewhat fancy number plate, it wasn't that fancy but someday you have a bad day.

Later we went to Rajim and I was quite happy to go there as I was going to witness the sangam.

As we reached there I was so amazed by seeing the wide Mahanadi river and sun was about to set and it looked so beautiful, I can't even describe it in words.

It's just the beauty to adore,

I feel I love sunset everywhere doesn't matter whether it is my roof top or some river but yaa I loved how beautiful it looked, the full round red sun and it's reflection in the river. Just amazing.

So kind of not so good Start of the day turned to be the good evening.

Later while driving back to home we had tea, it was good too,the way I like it and tried daal baati churma.

05/11 Midnight

While talking Reeshabh, I was feeling that there is something not good, I mean I can sense it, so I asked him many times

Yesterday night he said that I don't appreciate myself, I take things negatively, I pick negative things out of everything, etc he feels that after every 2-3 days, I need some assurance, etc. And I don't take when he compliments me instead I deny it and say something bad about me so he is getting little drifted.

I was just listening and I don't denied anything he said at that time, but yaa I said that like I am very confident person, it's just that, I accept that I have some sort of inferiority complex for my physical appearance from last 2-3 years.

Later in the morning, I thought that maybe he has also picked up all the negative things I said and didn't thought about the positive things or all the other things.

And what does he know about me, a very little, or just what I have told him, he doesn't know how am I as a person in real life, and it's easy for people to say such things you only know how you feel when people comment on your scars or wherever you go people keep noticing it and focusing there only, I ignore, but there is a limit for me too. And I am not getting a good feeling regarding this that's why today also I didn't talk to my father about him.

Day

We went to some jewellery shopping, bought bangles for mum by exchanging that 29 years old gold and then bought a payal for me, obviously I don't like wearing it, but eventually I will be buying all these stuff sooner or later.

Just end of the day.

I was listening to story some minutes back.

Btw there is some another reason too for giving the tittle apart from the story :P

Sissy in progress's Dear Diary