February 10, 2026

They said I shouldn't have researched so much. It would take me down a path I can't come back from. It's not alcohol or drugs but the euphoria is on the tip now. Another said darkness lies before me but I have been in the darkness so long that I don't fear the stars that are falling. Shouldn't have delved too deep into something forbidden. How is it forbidden when all of it was out there, like candy for anyone to walk over to grab, feel, devour, and let it come over me? I should feel all the worst of feelings of shame, but all I feel is even more curious and tempted.