Dear Diary, hi!
It's a strange, rainy, and depressing day, i feel kind of tired from working so much, listening to so much music, and being this girl who's too fond of another girl who doesn't care about me. I don't want to feel like i'm 15 again, but i feel stupid for liking her.
I could knock on her door and say things like, "Hey, don't be such an idiot, you don't need to beat around the bush to say you don't like me," and that maybe she could find someone else to inflate her ego by telling her she's beautiful or something. But every night, when she texts me about her day and the people she talked to (even knowing it hurts me), I reply: What an idiot i am!
I generally don't care about this; I don't consider romance and passion a necessity for survival. But I'm emotional because the year has turned, and I feel like everyone is euphoric about this news, while I'm still stuck in 2025, or 2024, whatever. I should grab a beer or something, act like an almost-adult, and tell her to go to hell with those stupidly beautiful brown eyes.
But here I am venting on an online diary site; it seems kind of crazy to me, but I feel better.
Well, whatever, it's not like I'm a good example of sanity.
And I don't even know if she likes girls too.
She says sexuality is something society created out of shame for being free.
I guess she just likes herself, in the end.
Insane.
That's it, until next time. (Today my day was summed up in suffering over a girl, but it's not always like that, lol)
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