Sometimes I hide certain posts… Some diary entries aren’t deleted, just hidden. It’s still hard to open up about my feelings, thoughts, and certain moments. It feels too personal for everyone to see. But I’m fighting it. I try to do it less and speak more openly. It also helps me improve my English skills — not without the help of translators, of course, but each time I have fewer problems expressing my joys and struggles on my own. It’s the best reason to work on my language, and I’m glad I’ve found something that truly motivates me.
BTW, I want to save this masterpiece here for myself:
THE TIME OF MECHANICAL UNIONS IS OVER
Relationships of the new era don’t start with “I need you.” They start with “I see you.” Not with the eyes, but with the soul. You don’t seek someone to fill your emptiness — you find someone with whom you want to share your fullness. And this union doesn’t promise ease, but it promises truth.
In it, emotions are not weakness, but the highest form of spiritual intelligence. Emotions are a code. They are a signal. They are the language of the soul, which feels cramped when speaking through logic. To feel means to be alive. To be connected. To hear.
In the old world, emotions were devalued: “Don’t fall apart,” “Be strong,” “Don’t feel — act.” In the new world, we hear: “Feel to the fullest. Live through it all. Cry. Speak. Open up. This is your strength.”
Because through vulnerability, portals to true closeness open. Where you’re not afraid to be “inconvenient,” “imperfect” — you’re simply real. And it’s this realness that makes you a magnet for the soul that seeks not a beautiful mask, but a response. A vibration. The truth.
Relationships of the new time are alchemy. They expose everything that has been dormant in you for centuries. You don’t just love — you remember who you were before the meeting. You uncover layers of memory, karma, lessons. This is deep soul work. It’s not always pleasant.
Sometimes it hurts to the bone because everything rises up: fears of rejection, control patterns, childhood pain, distortions of love. BUT IF YOU DON’T RUN AWAY — YOU REACH A NEW LEVEL.
It’s so beautiful, but also so difficult… Acceptance is a complicated thing🥲
A verse by a famous Soviet poet suddenly came to mind:“If only a soul could be kissed,
I’d cling to it like moonlight’s tender gleam.
How poor are those whose only goal is the bed—
Your soul is my aim. It’s all I dream.”
Yevgeny Yevtushenko