Any Help?

Alright, let me get this straight. I have no will to live at all. No matter how hard I try I don't see myself getting anywhere in future. I am not saying I am giving up hope, but what else can I do.

I am probably at my lowest and I think I might be using my last few days of energy. I am using that energy to be productive, some times. But nonetheless I am trying. I know that the only thing that is going to come up in a few month is disaster.

I don't want help because I know it is going to be useless. Wherever I go and search I can not find a single thing that will help me live on with life. I try to be motivated but no matter who or what, you can not get me motivated. I don't know why it is this way. It's just so disappointing knowing that you are trying but there is no result.

I don't know, what do I do? At this point just expect a miracle. And yeah, I am not going to KMS, don't go calling my local authority. It's stupid, "Why can't you just get help", they'll never get it.