December 08, 2022

 

Dear penny,

Ye 4-5 days, i really losed my appetite

( aaj thoda portion to phone milne ke baad wapas aa gya). Hehe, i just can't believe it, ye insaan sahi me mujhe engeneering nhi krne dena chahta and he'll surely gonna give his best taki mai prepare bhi na kr paau. 


Aur kuch to Krna padhega vrna sahi me ye banda mujhe fail krake manega.
Uhhh today was the worst I've ever felt, puri body tremble ho rhi thi and it was like a heart pain (eeeh aaj feel hua wo kaisa hota). Binding krane jaana somehow made me breathe again.  I think mujhe sahi me accept Krna padhega ki mai (darpok hu) and punjab se aane ke baad to indeed it's true.
But mujhe ye accept nhi krna TTTT 


Man!!! jitna roti hu na utni happiness wo de jaata TTTTT
Mujhe sahi me kaafi dar lgta, i really don't want you to suffer coz of me. (ohhh abhi yaad aaya, kannu keh rhi thi, i should use underscore ya ~ dis. If she somehow finds me in dis place, I'm really dead T~T).( But sahi me mujhe ye underscores nhi pasand:(  ,somehow cute hai.....pr nhi...TT...
Ohhh T.T ye better hai eeeh km se km daant nhi padhegi). 
Ohhh tera nishaan ka ye mid verse kaafi achaaaa haiiii. 
Hehe music sun kr mai sab bhool jaatiiii.

Ik now, i was afraid ki mere father ko pta chl jaayega to i won't able to talk with him. But I'm really glad majority to track jo maine bichaya vhi he was following to track me but fas gyi meri kannu. Even kitna jhooth bolte hai geezzzzzz, Inhe koi story telling competition me le jaao. But it's a relief, meri maa ko mujh pr trust hai.
( Unhe bs bahana chahiye ladne ka chahe koi bhi baat mile) 
But mujhe sahi me aisa lg rha ki he somehow read mama aur mera text jab maine unhe bola tha ki mmi ko punjab ki eng uni ke baare me mt btaao coz mujhe vha nhi jaana. 
Bhaad me jaae, inhe to meri har chiz se problem hai( walk , diet, having boys as friends aur unhe text krna, phone me ghusse rhna , earphones lgana, even padhna jo fs ye krne nhi de rhe, evry single thing dammit, jab school nhi jaao to he didn't even care jab jaao to 'ye to nhi jaa rhi thi' with thatt~ tone, aur mmi ke ghar waalo se to hai hi).

And it's true i really hate you man. Aur jabse iss bande ke baare me sab pta chlne lga tha and what my mother been thru, I do hate you from bottom of my heart. And I'm really sure now ki you're never gonna change even tihar se wapas aane ke baad bhi ( even isne wo kaam nhi kiya tha jis ke liye ye mahina andar tha but Mr. jo aapne abhi tk kiya hai na uske liye aapko idk but ye to bhottttt km tha).
(Tbh jab badi hui na tab i used to find that side of my father which I loved but wo kabhi mila nhi and wo ab bs km hota chla gya like tends to zero. Ab to i just can't trust him coz of his doings).

Jitna ye yr worst hai utna kuch log happiest bna rhe. ( M.eph , nudeln , coreen and ig bs)

Eeeeeeehhhh penny i gtg vrna ypt waale grp se nikal denge. 

Signing off ♡



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