April 01, 2022

 

My mom is never happy.
She hates all the pets that I and dad keep.

 When I don't look after my bunnies, she gets mad that she has to work too much. 
              Understandable, so I take care of them. Now she thinks I'm spending too much time with my rabbits.

I spend most of my day on the desk, she says I should be like other girls and help her do chores. 
             Fine, I'll do my chores. Now she says,"You're also a student, you know. Stop working like a housewife and study."

Like- 🥴?

Tf? Sorry I'm not fucking perfect like you, mom

I wish I could just say that to her face showing a middle finger but I think I have grown to fear that bitchy tyrant too much.

Sometimes, I think I should just kill myself coz that might make her realise how shitty of a parent she is, but I have no guts :/

Also I've realised that she's just cranky and has a massive exam coming up but hasn't studied a single chapter. That kinda sucks ngl. I want her to pass but there's honestly nothing I can do about it. 

Then again, she's always like this.
She's gone through a tough life so it's reasonable maybe.
But that doesn't explain her making me go through a tough time.
Then again, it's not her fault, she can't control her feelings...

I sound kinda cringe when I say this but,, after all that, idrc. I love her. If there is a heaven and hell, I really hope she goes to heaven but I don't wanna meet her there. 
Besides her mental instability,(and everything negative I said abt her) she's an overall good person and is very nice to other people. 
I feel like I've ruined her life and am nothing but a goddamn burden.

If you're still reading thanks for listening to my boring ass entry. This entry is,,, <3 very eye opening.
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