June 27, 2020

 

Dear Diary,

its my first post. im pretty bored so I thought about an online diary where I write my deepest darkest secrets to the online public for everyone to see, because thats smart. I made it seem kind of dramatic but actually im really boring so even my secrets arent that juicy. maybe its important to mention im 15 and starting my sophomore year after this summer. im at my uncles birthday and had some good ass strawberry cake. i can tell its the box kind because it has that artificial pink to the cake but still. kind of bored and want to go back to my girlfriends house. its so fun to say that. my girlfriend. 

ive never dated anyone in all my 15 years. no one has ever even had a crush on me or hit on me or told me im pretty, im not exaggerating at all which makes it sadder. im really not sure why she likes me. shes so insanly pretty and overall out of my league. and im not talking about just appearence wise. shes popular and has lots of friends and knows how to talk to people. shes really nice and knows how to comfort people. im litterally the exact opposite. ive never had a friend since 6th grade. again, im not kidding, ive spent all my lunches in the library. but its a bit weird. we actually started dating about 3 months ago, but broke up a week into the realationship because she thought I didnt care about her. then we didnt talk for 3 months and I thought maybe i just wasnt into girls. and all the sudden she texts me on Wednesday and wants to get back together. I said I wasnt into her and just wanted to be friends. she said it was fine and askes to go pver to her house. shes a really fun person so I was excited to hang out with my first friend in like 3 years. then I go over and its really fun and she starts talking about how much she liked me and she didnt mean to break up with me and I just got sucked back in again and forgot all the reasons I didnt want to date her. seriously what were they? I cant remember. so now. im dating her again and its totally fun. how fun to be able to say I have a girlfriend. I want to be over all the time but that sounds creepy and overbearing so I wont. its her birthday soon and she really likes bears so like i was thinking about going to build a bear and yknow? build a bear. in my head it sounds kind of cute but actually sounds pretty childish... maybe I should settle for a basic homemade basket? it would be nice if you could tell me what you think. 

text me @ 208 713 6069


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