June 24, 2020

Wake up. Outside is full of lovely bright sunshine. Coffee in hand. What more could you want!
The clock strikes 09:00 - since I am working from home, it's time to fire up the technology aka. laptop and get going for the day. Easy enough, right? 
No idea who's idea it was, but all of a sudden my eyeballs started leaking uncontrollably. Just like a dam has been let loose, and all the tears started flowing. 
What was the reason for this you ask? I have no idea. I asked myself how and what do I feel?!
I feel nothing - just emptiness. Has my heart been ripped out overnight? Several hours later, I still feel neutral. Nothing. Hollow.
What is going on with me? 
Has my mental state finally been broken overnight?  
One thing is for sure - I know for sure that work has drained me off all my mental creativity, turned me into a robot and this is the price I have to pay. A mental breakdown? Depression? Anxiety? Why do I feel nothing? Like literally nothing.
I am sitting here, looking at the screen trying to figure out what or how I feel - There is NOTHING. Simply blank. Jokes aside, but how is this possible?! 

I wish I had the answers to these questions.