Dear Diary,
It's past 3 in the morning and my body clock is telling me to drink coffee and eat noodles. I just woke up from a 13 hour sleep and my mind is wandering.
The rat is still awake. He's most likely playing video games with his friends and probably will end up sleeping late and moving our church day later this afternoon.
This past week, I have been feeling kinda off. It could also be because id I'm hormonal. But I just can't seem to feel genuinely happy this past few days.
It started last week, I think. But I'm im to be honest, this has been going in for quite a while. In my mind at least.
Do you ever get that feeling when you expect the littlest things from someone and that someone ends up disappointing you?
Do you ever feel like you wanted to be treated in a certain way but just can't seem to tell someone how?
Would you rather be with someone who is touchy feely or someone who is sweet and thoughtful?
Is it okay to expect things from someone? Things that people do when they are in love?
The Rat doesn't go to our house.
He's forgetful of important things.
He's a liar.
It feels that I'm wavering.
And I'm scared because a part of me wants to fix it but there's also a part that tells me that it's my fault. That it's mostly me making things difficult.
But one thing's for sure.
I am not happy anymore.