July 21, 2021


I was learning photoshop earlier from YouTube and edited a photo. It feels good to learn  something new. There are multiple of hobbies I feel like picking up right now but there's only so much time. My brain is all over the place because I want to do everything at the same time..like if I could I would duplicate myself ๐Ÿ˜‚

Last week, I found a sewing machine and played around with it despite not having much prior experiences with sewing. I was never good with handswork or anything to do with the hands because I'm clumsy and I happen to destroy everything I touch. The last time I sewed something was in 6th grade for a school project. That was a failure. I was so discouraged at the time because even the boys in my class did it better than me lol 

Well, last night I found this 60 year old something dude's tik tok. He was surprisingly up to date with the currents trends and he even edited some cool videos too of himself and his wife. It was surprisingly good. So, I guess you can say that I was inspired by him and felt..defeated at the same time. That made me want to learn video editing because if an old guy can do it then why can't I? 

I never had this much interest in hobbies before because all I cared about when I was younger was maintaining my grades. It was the only thing that I had pride in and  gave me some kind of self worth because my parents placed a lot of importance on my grades. Unfortunately it became an unhealthy personality trait lol ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ 

And I think it's also because I get intimidated whenever I'm learning something new since I'm a pretty slow learner. So I usually avoid it or I procrastinate a lot. It takes a longer time for me to be good at something 

But hey, so far this year alone, I found out that I do for a fact enjoy painting houses and I know how to use and set up the sewing machine now. Most importantly, I do it because I thoroughly enjoy it. And not to compensate some  lack of self worth or something along the line. I think that's a pretty good start. I just need to stop being in my head and just do it